In our journey as foster and adoptive parents, we often face situations that require stepping out in courage and that test our faith. One of the most common ones for me was, “What will ________ think?” You can fill in your own blank there, but for me, it often included my pastor, my parents, in-laws, friends, co-workers, neighbors, and the random lady in the grocery store trying to pretend she’s not looking as one of my girls smarts off for the thousandth time.
There have been times when our neighbors saw police cars in our driveway, our pastor read shocking things our daughters posted on social media, our friends witnessed bad behaviors, our friends heard hateful things about us from an upset teenager, and much more. These moments were embarrassing, and we often found ourselves not only struggling with being faithful to love and guide our girls through excruciatingly difficult behaviors, choices, and emotions but also carrying the burden of what others thought about us.
Stepping Out in Courage
When we think of courage, it’s easy to think about stepping out in front of a moving car to save someone’s life. Stepping into a church sanctuary in front of everyone who knows us with a child who is making a scene, cussing, or blatantly defiant is also courageous—and our willingness to do so might save their eternal life. It’s not comfortable to have others stare at us, or talk behind our backs, or judge us for what they might consider “permissive” parenting.
My husband and I knew a foster mom in one of our trauma classes who had a three-year-old foster son who could cuss the paint off the side of a house and put any sailor to shame. Cussing was the way that he communicated in his biological home to be seen and heard. I remember the foster mom saying in class one day, “Sometimes when we’re in a grocery store, and he’s throwing out F-bombs left and right, I wish I had a shirt that said, “It’s not my fault,” because of the number of stares we get. And you wouldn’t believe the number of people who loud-whisper, ‘If that were my kid…”
For this mom, walking through a grocery store was courageous. She felt strongly about not prohibiting this little boy from experiencing normal life because of what other people might think. It’s so easy to scoff at and judge others when we have zero idea what’s going on in their life or their story. And it’s especially hard when we’re the ones being judged. By the way, that three-year-old is now a fully adopted young man in his late teens, and he’s amazing.
The Courage of Noah
Noah faced a similar challenge. In Genesis 6:9, we learn that Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked faithfully with God. God commanded Noah to build an ark, a task that seemed absurd to those around him. It had never rained from the sky before, and the concept of a flood was unimaginable. Yet, Noah obeyed God without hesitation.
It’s hard to imagine how much ridicule Noah and his sons received as they built a boat for decades. It’s hard for me to do something for an hour if people ridicule me and make fun of me—much less stick with it for decades (an estimated 50–100 years!). This wasn’t just some small project he hid in his garage (I know, he didn’t have a garage—but still). This was an act of faith and obedience done in broad daylight for all to see. Until Noah and his family entered the boat, a mist watered plants, and all water flowed from underground springs. Noah not only built a giant boat but also told everyone that the earth would flood. At that time, based on man’s knowledge of the earth’s waters, it was scientifically and historically impossible for that to happen.
“This is the account of Noah and his family. Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked faithfully with God…Noah did everything just as God commanded him. “
Genesis 6:9,22 (NIV)
Noah as an Example for Foster Parents
Genesis 6:22 (NIV) tells us, “Noah did everything just as God commanded him.” This verse underscores Noah’s unwavering faith and obedience. Despite the ridicule and judgment from his contemporaries, Noah stood firm in his courage, trusting in God’s plan.
Like Noah, we are often called to stand firm in our faith and courage, even when others do not understand or support us. The police cars in our driveway and the social media posts were publicly visible signs of our struggles, but they were also opportunities to demonstrate our trust in God and unwavering love for our girls—no matter what they did. We knew our journey was part of a greater purpose, just like Noah’s.
Noah’s story reminds us that true courage comes from trusting in God’s promises and being obedient to His commands, regardless of others’ opinions. When we face judgment or ridicule, we can find strength in knowing that we are walking faithfully with God, just as Noah did.
A Short Prayer for Foster Parents
Heavenly Father, thank You for the example of Noah’s courage and faith. Help us to stand firm in our own journeys as foster parents, trusting in Your promises and being obedient to Your commands, even when others judge or ridicule us. Strengthen our hearts and give us the courage to face each challenge with unwavering faith. May we always walk faithfully with You, knowing that You are with us every step of the way. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
©2024 Pam Parish. Used with Permission.
